It was a normal Tuesday morning and we were on the way to work. My son would not stop whining. And I reached my limit. Well no. Let me rephrase. I was trying to regulate my internal storm of the morning, but I failed.
See that right there? I am so quick to say I failed. ‘I’m a failure at parenting’ is the fast belief about myself. And this leads me to shame.
Shame. That morning, it washed right over me and swept me under its wave. It happened all so fast.
Shame is the notion that one is unworthy, defective, or a failure in some way. It is the “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging,” according to Brené Brown (from Daring Greatly, 2012). As one of the most painful emotions experienced, shame disconnects us from others, leading to feelings of isolation.
But here’s the thing about shame. Shame binds to other core emotions which then stops us from being able to process an experience or make changes. And this is why you need to be aware of when you are experiencing shame, slay that shame, and then act with awareness.
Tune in this week to find out more about shame. It is an emotion that so many of my clients – and myself! – experience.
In this episode, I discuss:
- What is shame?
- What is the difference between shame and guilt?
- Five strategies to help cope with shame.
- I end the episode by talking about how I repaired this moment with my son and the lessons to take away from these moments of being raw and vulnerable.
Motherhood and postpartum nutrition with registered dietician Melissa Mitri. Tune in next week!
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